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Post by mringgenberg on Nov 28, 2023 21:30:22 GMT -5
A
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Nov 29, 2023 8:14:55 GMT -5
A it is and we're off and running. New game, so naturally everyone plays. (scans card) Nice of them to work in one of my other shows. Doug Morris said, "I just finished watching the Nerdocrumbesian version of Lucky Numbers. The prize coordinator must be really mean. In their main event, one of their prizes is a 14-day cruise to BLANK." (audience laughs and applauds) (think music plays)
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Nov 29, 2023 20:13:56 GMT -5
Matt, let's see if you can get on the board with this. Doug Morris said, "I just finished watching the Nerdocrumbesian version of Lucky Numbers. The prize coordinator must be really mean. In their main event, one of their prizes is a 14-day cruise to BLANK."
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Post by mringgenberg on Nov 29, 2023 20:30:29 GMT -5
Nowhere
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Nov 29, 2023 22:50:09 GMT -5
(mix of groans and applause) Doug: Cruise to nowhere, eh? Well, at least it saves up on the prize budget. Let's check to see if there's a "nowhere" -- starting with Bill? Bill: (card) The South Pole (buzz) (scattered laughter) Doug: What's worse? The cruise was one-way. Sam, what came to mind? Sam: The place where all ships go to disappear: (buzz) (audience cheers)Bill: Now THAT was brilliant and THE definitive answer! I guess sitting in a "square", a triangle answer had not occurred to me. Doug: Brilliant indeed. A Rodney Dangerfield-style answer, if you remember one of his routines. Nels? Nels: (card) Mark Liotta’s bedroom (buzz) Doug: Ohhhh kay. Don't think that's geographically possible. To Tony now. Doug Morris said, "I just finished watching the Nerdocrumbesian version of Lucky Numbers. The prize coordinator must be really mean. In their main event, one of their prizes is a 14-day cruise to BLANK."Doug: And Matt said "nowhere". Tony: The best place on earth... (card) (buzz) (audience laughs) Doug: The Improv's YouTube channel posted Ray Combs' standup routine -- and he noted it would've been interesting to see "The Love Boat" in Soviet waters. (more laughter) With humor like that, we miss Ray dearly. Bryan? Bryan: (card) Timbuktu (buzz) (scattered laughter) Doug: I don't think that's geographically possible. And Kevin, please wrap this half of the round up. Kevin: They're just wondering how they're gonna get the boat there... (buzz) (scattered laughter) Doug: Ohhhh -- dear -- don't get me started on some dingbat I worked with who kept mispronouncing "Sahara" on the air. This ding-a-ling was about as dumb as Dumb Dora. Audience: (almost in unison) HOW DUMB WAS SHE?!?!?! (scattered laughter) Doug: Let's just say the dingbat put the wrong emphasis on the wrong syllables in "Sahara" and leave it at that. Doug: Matt, as for you, "nowhere" got you -- well -- nowhere. But you've got time for a comeback. Mark, your time at bat's coming. |
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Nov 29, 2023 22:58:00 GMT -5
And let's see what B has for you. And once again, all the stars play. (scans card and laughs) (scattered laughs from crowd) What are the odds? This question refers to another dingbat I worked with. In any event. Bill the barkeep said, "Fred had way too much to drink last night. The janitor had to clean up a mess after Fred mistook BLANK for the urinal." (audience laughs and applauds) (think music plays) |
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Nov 30, 2023 11:52:34 GMT -5
They're all ready. Mark, let's see if you can take the early lead with this. Bill the barkeep said, "Fred had way too much to drink last night. The janitor had to clean up a mess after Fred mistook BLANK for the urinal."
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Post by GameShowNetwork on Dec 1, 2023 16:56:31 GMT -5
the bar
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Post by billmcdee on Dec 1, 2023 17:18:59 GMT -5
Talk about wetting your whistle.
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Post by samthebravesfan on Dec 1, 2023 20:27:38 GMT -5
Along with just about everything else, yeesh.
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 1, 2023 20:52:00 GMT -5
(scattered laughter and applause) Doug: Knowing the real-life inspiration represented by "Fred" in this question, and knowing how much time he spent bar-hopping back in the day, that's a good answer. Let's see if the bar itself was written down by any of our stars. Bill, we start again with you. Bill: (card) The sink. (buzz) (scattered laughter) Doug: So you're saying he made it to the lavatory -- but went to the wrong part of the lavatory. Got it. Sam? Sam: It was a really expensive mess. Fred's going to have to pick up the damages from his tab from going in the pockets of this. (buzz) (audience laughs and applauds) Doug: Number 1 -- side pocket. (more laughter) Nels? Nels: (card) Apple juice (buzz) (scattered laughter from crowd) Doug: Apple juice, vodka, and -- yeah. Eww. Not a bad answer but no match still as visit Tony. Bill the barkeep said, "Fred had way too much to drink last night. The janitor had to clean up a mess after Fred mistook BLANK for the urinal."Doug: And Mark said "the bar". Tony: I hope it's the right brand... (card) (buzz) (scattered laughter from crowd) Doug: More apple juice. At least we're getting things *served* at a bar -- but not a bar itself. Bryan? Bryan: (card) Jukebox (buzz) (scattered cheers) Doug: Now *that* was my answer. Some jukeboxes have little water bubbles that go up. Fred could misconstrue that for a urinal after so many adult beverages. (scattered laughter from crowd) Kevin, please wrap this round up for us. Kevin: All that booze has to go somewhere. Too bad Fred put it in… (card) (buzz) (scattered laughter from crowd) Doug: Well -- geographically close on half of these. Doug: Fred's the only man I ever knew who graduated college with a 4.0 blood-alcohol level. (audience laughs and applauds)Doug: We're scoreless after Round 1. We'll play Round 2 after you watch these words of interest. Pay attention. There'll be a pop quiz later. (audience applause; MG-HSH music plays) |
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Post by tmann3x on Dec 1, 2023 22:08:38 GMT -5
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 2, 2023 20:23:11 GMT -5
(audience cheers)Welcome back. Let's play Round 2. (Doug pushes button on toaster) Now, we've got a scoreless tie. Rules say when the score is tied is going into a round, the player who did not go first in the previous round starts this one. So, Mark, you'll start by choosing A or B.
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Post by GameShowNetwork on Dec 2, 2023 20:52:26 GMT -5
A
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 2, 2023 21:31:33 GMT -5
Going for A -- and since we're scoreless, all the stars play both questions in this round. Here's A for Mark. Time Traveling Tom said, "I just got back from the year 2045 were I saw Taylor Swift's inauguration as President of the United States. But wait! There's more! BLANK is her First Gentleman and it's *not* Travis Kelce!"
(audience laughs and applauds) (think music plays) |
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Post by tmann3x on Dec 2, 2023 21:43:58 GMT -5
Ooh... (giggles) I love this question.
Since this is our very last Match Game of 2023, I have somewhat of a spoiler alert at the end of this episode.
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Post by billmcdee on Dec 3, 2023 9:20:52 GMT -5
This was for certain a Taylor made question.
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 3, 2023 15:59:52 GMT -5
*Taylor* made. Leave it to Bill to be *swift* on the puns. (mix of laughs and groans from crowd) With that, Mark, they're ready. Here's the question again. Time Traveling Tom said, "I just got back from the year 2045 were I saw Taylor Swift's inauguration as President of the United States. But wait! There's more! BLANK is her First Gentleman and it's *not* Travis Kelce!"
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Post by GameShowNetwork on Dec 3, 2023 20:33:36 GMT -5
Another sports athlete
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 3, 2023 21:45:59 GMT -5
(scattered groans) Doug: Ohhh dear. I fear somewhere along the line we'll have a generic versus specific mismatch. Let's check answers anyway. Starting with Bill. Bill: Well since it is FIRST Gentleman, I'd say it would be the FIRST guy that she ever was in a relationship with... (buzz) (scattered cheers) Doug: There ya go. That's going back to -- what -- ought-seven -- ought-eight? Anyhoo, Sam? Sam: Well, this isn't well-known, but I went along with Time-Traveling Tom. Turns out Taylor stuck with football, but wanted an older man. A lot older. (card) (mixed reactions from crowd) (buzz) (more mixed reactions from crowd) Doug: My hunch was right. Again -- classic Match Game rule -- general answers can't match specifics. If all six stars wrote down names of sports stars, that wouldn't be fair to Matt. Nels? Nels: (card) Kanye West (buzz) (audience boos)Doug: So you're saying -- they patched things up, buried the hatchet after that 2009 VMA incident and got married. Ohhhh kay. Someone bury this episode in a time capsule and see if (a) Taylor became Prez and (b) she and Kanye tied the knot. The latter is unlikely. Anyhoo, to Tony. Time Traveling Tom said, "I just got back from the year 2045 were I saw Taylor Swift's inauguration as President of the United States. But wait! There's more! BLANK is her First Gentleman and it's *not* Travis Kelce!"
Doug: 'Fraid Mark needs to you to say "another sports athlete" or words to that effect to get on the scoreboard. Tony: My first answer was supposed to be Kendrick Lamar... but my gut tells me to go for the alternative and say... (card) (buzz)Tony: Can I get a "boo"? (audience boos)Doug: Should've gone with your first instinct, as Gene would say. Bryan? Bryan: Robin Thicke (buzz) (scattered laughs and cheers) Doug: I've actually met Robin. Thing is he's engaged to a lovely young lady. Kevin, please end this half of the round for us. Kevin: She didn't change her name, but she'd have no reason to if she was married to... (buzz) (scattered cheers) Doug: Another former lover/fellow singer. Doug: Can't give you credit for being in the ballpark with Tom Brady, Mark. Sorry -- but rules are rules. Matt, chance to capitalize coming up. |
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 3, 2023 21:48:57 GMT -5
And once again, we'll need all the stars to play this. Old Man Perrywinkle said, "ABC reached out to me about being the next golden bachelor. But instead of giving out roses, they want me to give out BLANKS to potential suitors."
(audience laughs and applauds) (think music plays) |
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Post by tmann3x on Dec 4, 2023 21:41:33 GMT -5
Sam is less than an hour away from missing the deadline... |
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Post by samthebravesfan on Dec 4, 2023 21:57:34 GMT -5
*wakes up from a pillow, scribbles down an answer and slides it into the slot* Sorry, fell asleep. Was channeling Old Man Perriwinkle there.
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Post by billmcdee on Dec 5, 2023 5:34:54 GMT -5
(as Groucho Marx) I've hoid (heard) of pillow talk before but this is ridiculous!
ôvô
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 5, 2023 7:55:51 GMT -5
And Sam's ready. They're all ready. Matt, hope you're ready. Old Man Perrywinkle said, "ABC reached out to me about being the next golden bachelor. But instead of giving out roses, they want me to give out BLANKS to potential suitors."
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Post by mringgenberg on Dec 5, 2023 8:58:08 GMT -5
Walking Canes
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 5, 2023 19:05:21 GMT -5
(scattered applause) Doug: Judge, I'm just curious. If "walker" came up, what's the ruling? (ding)Doug: Okay. The walking cane has evolved over the year. I'll just say I speak from second hand experience and leave it at that. Bill, we're looking for a walking cane. Bill: Two of the potential suitors were a manicurist and a dental hygienist. They fought over him tooth and nail. (card) (buzz) (audience cheers)Doug: More biting humor from Bill. (scattered groans) You like Bill's puns but not mine. Ohhh kay. Sam? Sam: Well, Old Man Perriwinkle really wants to be sure that the ladies are able to start off their morning right after a big glass of water and sleep. And what better than a fresh set of ... (card) (buzz) (more cheers) Doug: More false teeth. But not a walker or a walking cane as we go to Nels. Nels: (card) (buzz) (more cheers) Doug: Wow -- more false teeth. Well, let's head down stairs and see if we get a walking cane. Old Man Perrywinkle said, "ABC reached out to me about being the next golden bachelor. But instead of giving out roses, they want me to give out BLANKS to potential suitors."Doug: Tony, what say ye? Tony: This episode is sponsored today by... (card) (buzz) (more cheers and laughs) Doug: Dentures or false teeth seems to be the definitive answer. Bryan? Bryan: (card) (buzz) (scattered cheers; some groan at possible sweep) Doug: Five dentures. Kevin, did you make it unanimous? Kevin: Gotta be sure they're REALLY fake before he gives these away... (scattered groans -- knowing this was unanimous) (card) (buzz) Doug: Oh wow. Doug: Matt, ya could've maxed out. Sorry about that. Well -- somehow, some way, we will get a match and someone will move on to Squares. Find out how -- after this. (audience applause; MG-HSH music plays) |
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Post by tmann3x on Dec 5, 2023 19:27:33 GMT -5
========================================================================================================================= *fade to promo* (win cue)(cheers and applause)SHADOE STEVENS: Closed Captioning sponsored today by the following-- |
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Post by dougmorrisontheair on Dec 6, 2023 18:04:25 GMT -5
(audience cheers)We're back. For real, let's find a winner. (Doug pushes button on toaster) We've still got a scoreless tie. Since Mark went first in Round 2, Matt, you'll start Round 3 by choosing A or B.
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Post by mringgenberg on Dec 6, 2023 19:28:46 GMT -5
B
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