MATCH GAME/HOLLYWOOD SQUARES HOUR [NBC] - Episode 42

[dougmorrisontheair]

(grabs B)

Shederick, let's see if you can tie up the ballgame -- or perhaps take the lead. All six stars, please respond to this.

Vegeta's scouter has determined Fat Frieda's BLANK is over 9000.

(audience laughs and applauds)

(think music plays)

[dougmorrisontheair]

And they're all set. Shederick, let's see if you can tie or take the lead with this.

Vegeta's scouter has determined Fat Frieda's BLANK is over 9000.

[djshadowwolf420]

WEIGHT!

[billmcdee]

I'm sorry, we cannot wait, this is only an hour show...



Oh....you meant WEIGHT, not "Wait!"

[dougmorrisontheair]

(audience cheers)

Doug: There are about three great possibilities -- and "weight" is one of them. Let's see if these stars were thinking the same way -- starting with Mark.

Mark: Weight (card)

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: And just like that, tie ballgame. Bill, do you break the tie and give Shederick the lead?

Bill: He has determined that Fat Frieda's (card) daily caloric intake is over 9,000!

(audience laughs)

(buzz)

Doug: That's another good one. Nels, what do you bring to the table this time?

Nels: Cookies -- just kidding...

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: And the lead changes hands. Now let's go downstairs and Tony.

Vegeta's scouter has determined Fat Frieda's BLANK is over 9000.

Doug: And Shederick's looking for weight.

Tony: Where's Tony Little when you need him? (shows card)

(ding; audience applause)

Tony: (as Tony Little) You can do it!!!!!!!

(scattered laughter from crowd)

Doug: With that, Shederick wins a *little* more money. Kevin?

Kevin: Only one reasonable answer: her...

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: There's four for Shederick. Frank, do you make it a near perfect round for him?

Frank: (shakes head no) I’m going a different route.

(buzz)

Doug: As I see it, cholesterol count, calorie count, and weight are the best answers on this one.

Doug: Weight proved to be the best for Shederick. He leads 400 to 100. Find out who's going to Hollywood Squares -- right after this.


(audience applause; MG-HSH music plays)

[tmann3x]

=============================================================================================


*fade to promo*



(win cue)

(cheers and applause)

SHADOE STEVENS: Closed Captioning sponsored today by the following--

[dougmorrisontheair]

(audience cheers)

Let's find a winner in Match Game.

(presses button on toaster revealing Round 3 questions)

Shederick, you're leading at this point in the game. So that means you may start us off with A or B.

[djshadowwolf420]

A for ample bosoms

[dougmorrisontheair]

(grabs A; scattered laughter from crowd)

Sensing a omen perhaps, Shederick goes with A -- and just two stars will play the question.

Bill from the top tier -- which eventually will be the middle tier -- and Frank from what's always the bottom tier. (scattered giggles from crowd) I hear you snickering. Here's the question.


Confucius say, "Man who cannot wait to meet beautiful nurse must be BLANK."

(audience laughs and applauds)

(think music plays)

[dougmorrisontheair]

Okay, they're ready. Players, I should note if you do acheive a perfect score of matching all six stars, we'll add $400 to the $600 you'd have by then -- for a total of $1000. Match Game winner also pockets another $500.

So, with that clarified, Shederick, here's the question one more time.



Confucius say, "Man who cannot wait to meet beautiful nurse must be BLANK."

[djshadowwolf420]

(CENSORED!)

*Due to the graphic nature of Shederick's answer.  His response is censored to preserve the rated PG standard of this program.

[dougmorrisontheair]

(audience laughs and applauds)

Doug: Ummm -- for those playing from home -- Shederick's answer rhymes with "corny". (scattered laughter from home) Further, Shederick, I'm afraid you missed the pun. Bill, what must a man do to meet a beautiful nurse?

Bill: The definitive answer... (card)

(buzz) (audience cheers)

Doug: Bingo! Get it now? Want to meet a gorgeous nurse?  It's best that you be patient -- and become -- a -- patient. Frank, what did you bring to this table?

(buzz) (scattered laughter)


Doug: Not only an answer -- but a commentary as well.

Doug: So -- Shederick -- you stay at 400. Jacob, the door's ajar. You'll have the services of five stars on your last question. Match three of them and we go to a tie-breaker. Four matches wins. Five matches wins plus adds extra cheddar to your earnings. Anything less -- and Shederick's going to the Squares.

[dougmorrisontheair]

(grabs B)

And everyone on the panel but...

...Mark will play this question. The rest of you please complete this.

Gil said, "Charades at yesterday's game night won't be forgotten anytime soon. It only took three seconds for Voluptuous Velma to pantomime 'Twin Peaks' by pointing to her BLANKS".

(audience laughs and applauds)

(think music plays)

[tmann3x]

Steve Anderson, Clara Solsak, and Michael Koontz... be ready for The Hollywood Squares.

[coolclar1]

Standing By

[tmann3x]

Don't worry, Shederick... I'm sure the FCC are user friendly.

(audience laughs)

[djshadowwolf420]

Lol

[dougmorrisontheair]

Okie doke, they're all set, Jacob. Here's your last question in regulation.

Gil said, "Charades at yesterday's game night won't be forgotten anytime soon. It only took three seconds for Voluptuous Velma to pantomime 'Twin Peaks' by pointing to her BLANKS".

[wheelfan1230]

Bosoms?

[billmcdee]

May 26, 2021 6:56:58 GMT -5 wheelfan1230 said:

Bosoms?

That's the breast.....er.....BEST answer I've heard so far today!

[wheelfan1230]

😂

[asja2002]

Here! Here!

[dougmorrisontheair]

Doug: Indeed that the answer. You just need three breasts to stay in business. Yes, that character from "Total Recall" needs to appear -- (scattered laughter from crowd)-- or you need three stars to match with you. Bill, we start with you.

Bill: (card) Bosoms

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: Just like that, Jacob's up to $200. Nels, do you make it three?

Nels: (card) Boobs

(ding; audience applause)

Doug: There's 300. We just need one more breast from downstairs for a tie. Tony?

Tony: Before there was YouTube... there was-- (shows card)

(ding; audience applause)

Tony: --a primitive device known as television.

Doug: Nothing primitive about this. We're tied. Kevin, if you said "boobs", Jacob clinches victory.

Kevin: Don'tcha just love these questions?

(dings; audience applause)

Doug: And that's a win for Jacob. *However*...

if

Frank

wrote

down

"boobs",

Jacob

wins

another

$100

for

the

match,

$400

for

the

perfect

score

and

the

$500

to

confirm

the

win.

Frank,

what

say

ye?


Frank: There is a reason she is called voluptuous.

(dings; audience applause; win music plays; MG-HSH theme plays)

Doug: Bingo! (Jacob and Shederick shake hands) Jacob, please take your place on the blue dot. Shederick, $400 plus fine gifts including a skunk money coin from one of my unsold pilot. (scattered laughter from crowd) Nice hand for Shederick.

(audience cheers; MG players' area rolls off stage left; rest of HS grid rolls in from stage right)

Doug: Jacob, you've already got $1500 in your pocket -- and a chance to win a lot more. We're setting up for Hollywood Squares. Three more stars are on the way, Tony and I trade places, and goodness knows what else will happen. Stay tuned!

[tmann3x]

(underscore theme)


SHADOE:  A member of our studio audience will receive new baseball equipment. You'll be hitting out of the field with this baseball equipment. Includes three bats, two baseball bags, balls, mitts, and batting gloves. From Big 5 Sporting Goods.

And some of our departing contestants will receive--


Broyhill Showcase Galleries. Wander through dozens of rooms of beautiful furniture at a Broyhill Showcase Gallery, and take home a world of decorating ideas.

For that Beverly Hills look, pamper yourself alongside the stars at the exclusive Umberto salon of Beverly Hills. A day of beauty specially tailored for you, furnished by Umberto.

Outdoor Products' rugged, tough, and lightweight quality luggage. Waterproof, 1000 and near Cordura-plus nylon. Great for travel, gym, and athletic use from Outdoor Products.

And the 2021 Edition of the 22-volume World Book Encyclopedia, with thousands of new revisions, the input of over 4,000 experts and 25,000 images, this collection will provide everything you should know and everything you've ever wanted to know.





(main theme)

And now... it's time for more of the--

With...

(cheers and applause)

From Second Chance...

(cheers and applause)

(cheers and applause)

And, taking over... the master of The Hollywood Squares... TONY LANE!

(wild cheers and applause)


*Doug passes the mic to Tony as he enters center stage*


TONY:  And we'll be right back to play The Hollywood Squares.  Don't touch that remote...

(cheers, applause continues)






*fade to commercial*


=================================================================================

[tmann3x]

*back to studio*

(Super Match cue, cheers and applause)


SHADOE STEVENS:  And now, Tony Lane and The Hollywood Squares.


(cheers, applause continues)



TONY:  Thanks, Shadoe.  Welcome to the second half of our show.  I'm here with the winner of Match Game... Jacob Lassiter.  He had won the perfecto with a cash total of $1,500.  And in just a few seconds, he'll be facing the champion on The Hollywood Squares.

Before we begin, please allow me to re-introduce our three additional panelists--

At top left, we have Steve Anderson.

(cheers and applause)



At top center, we have the host of "Second Chance"... Michael Koontz.

(cheers, applause continues)



And finally... we have Australia's Sweetheart Clara Solsak.

(more cheers and applause)



So Steve... I heard that you were a guest host of "Split Second".  How does it feel hosting the show based on a failed pilot by Rob Weller?

[asja2002]

I wouldn’t say that the format was flawed per se, but trying a show in a year where about 15 games were fighting for air time, naturally some wouldn’t make the cut. I enjoyed hosting and it’s something that I hope the powers that be let me do again sometime

[tmann3x]

That's great to hear.  Hope to see you host another game show in the future.

Right now, let's meet the champ and play The Hollywood Squares.


(cheers and applause)


*host and contestant stand and sit on their podium*

And sitting in the X desk is our defending champion.  In just one day, she had ultimately shattered the glass ceiling for becoming the first and only female to win over $100,000 in cash and prizes... including an electric automobile.

(audience gasps)


With a grand total of $174,376... say hello to Lainey Murphy!

(loud cheers and applause)


Lainey, please tell us about yourself.

[lmurphy10]

Well i'm a school teacher from Brooklyn NY and my students give me a present to give to Tony (She pulls a card out and hands it to Doug)

[dougmorrisontheair]

(runs from his square; opens card; reads it)

We love watching our teacher win big on Match Game - Hollywood Squares on NBC4. Ah, how nice!

(runs back to his square)

[billmcdee]

As hall monitor I must give Doug 2 demerits, one for running from his square over to the player area, and one for running back.

Teacher said no running in the halls!